


please don't jump (it's christmas)

by criousgaymers



Category: Banana Bus Squad
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Based on a Dallon Weekes Song, M/M, Original Child Characters, Suicide mentions, lots of fluff, tyler is depressed af and hates christmas
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-25
Updated: 2017-12-25
Packaged: 2019-02-20 07:07:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,088
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13141575
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/criousgaymers/pseuds/criousgaymers
Summary: it's that time of the year again.





	please don't jump (it's christmas)

**Author's Note:**

> possible trigger warning!!  
> based on 'please don't jump (it's christmas)' by dallon weekes. (https://youtu.be/7aNM1k7IkNU?t=5)  
> i originally wrote this for a christmas special, but i think it's too good to waste so, here you go.  
> merry christmas/hannukah/kwanzaa to anyone who celebrates them! and if you don't, happy holidays nonetheless! hope you enjoy!
> 
> -max

_another year’s over,_

_the snow starts to fall_

_just like you would if you ended it all_

_but tonight's not the night_

_if only you'd answer my calls_

_please pick up now_

 

it's that time of the year again.

christmas. it's snowing, it's cold, everyone's buying last minute gifts, spending the time with their loved ones, doing stuff that people usually do. it's everyone's favorite time of the year.

except for one person.

tyler never liked christmas.

he didn't know if it was because he lived alone, or because all his friends were away, or because of his depression that had been eating him away for ten years, or that he genuinely didn't like christmas.

he honestly thought it was a waste of time. spending money on stuff and calling them 'presents', making so much food and end up only eating half of it, putting up a dead/fake tree and decorating it.

tyler always had this habit of falling of this state of depression every single christmas, where he just lays down doing nothing but drink his feelings away to the point where he feels numb, the sound of the party happening next door in the background. other times he would sit on the roof, staring at the stars and the christmas lights on the houses in his neighbourhood, and wondering if to jump or not and just end his long suffering.

well here he is again, laying on the same old floor, no alcohol in his system yet, but he didn't feel a thing. he was staring at the ceiling, listening to the laughter and the yelling that was coming from next door. they sounded like they were having so much fun. his eyes started watering, the feeling of loneliness suddenly filling him up.

he wiped his eyes and got up, starting to head to the roof. he walked by his phone, which had no notifications. no calls, no messages. not even from his family. he stopped talking to them a long time ago anyway.

he made it to the roof and sat down close to the edge. he could feel the cold wind through his thin jacket, not really caring about being cold. it wasn't snowing, but it looked like it was about to. it was peaceful; but the only thing that wasn't peaceful was tyler's emotions.

he stood up, the sudden urge to jump suprising him. he had never attempted to, but he had though about it so many times. it always... scared him. the idea of dying seemed so peaceful yet so horrifying at the same time.

he started breathing heavily, and started feeling as everything else around him was becoming closer, as he was staring at the ground below him, the urge to jump was becoming stronger. he clenched his fists and lowered down an inch, getting ready to leap.

_''HEY!''_

tyler turned around and saw a tall man with short brown hair and glasses standing outside his house, staring up at him. his face had a scared expression and his eyes were wide open. he was wearing a black coat and a scarf around his neck, it was pretty cold after all. tyler didn't knew how he managed to be in a thin jacket in such weather, but nothing really mattered to him anymore.

the man yelled something again that tyler couldn't make out, it was along the lines of, ''don't do it'' or something. when tyler didn't respond, he started walking closer to tyler's house. he shouted again, with a slight english accent, ''please don't jump.''

tyler kept being silent.

''p-please. it's christmas.''

''which is exactly why i'm doing it.'' tyler said quietly, but loud enough so that the man heard him.

he seemed suprised that tyler responded, but also confused by his answer. ''what do you mean by that?''

tyler didn't say anything, he just took a step closer to the edge.

''HEY HEY! woah there buddy, please don't do it, i-'' the man nervously called, taking more steps closer to tyler's house. ''i know we don't know each other but, i-it's not worth it, especially now, it's the holidays!'' he exclaimed. ''so please don't jump, cause it's christmas, and not worth it.''

tyler still has his back turned at him, not talking. but he wasn't moving either, and he didn't knew why.

''you can't turn away from your problems, you know.'' the man said. tyler rolled his eyes and continued ignoring him.

''go away.'' tyler said.

''i am not leaving untill you come down from there.'' the man said loudly, stomping his foot down on the ground and crossing his arms.

tyler huffed annoyed. _this guy is not going anywhere, isn't he?_

he sighed and turned around, looking at the man, a look of defeat on his face. the man smiled triumphantly, watching as tyler got down from the roof into his house.

the man waited patiently outside of tyler's house. he felt a bit relieved when the sound of a door unlocking came out of tyler's door. the door finally opened and revealed tyler, who had changed his shirt and jacket into a hoodie for warmth.  
tyler raised an eyebrow, opening the door a bit more. the man seemed confused.

''are you coming in or what?'' tyler asked.

the man's cheeks flushed. ''uh, y-yeah sure.'' he stuttered and stepped in the house, tyler closing the door behind him.

the brit placed his coat on the coat hanger next to the door. he looked around the living room and could feel the emptyness and the loneliness that the room gave off. there were no pictures of himself and other people, no decoration, just plain furniture and walls. he realised that tyler wasn't behind him anymore and turned around, seeing him sitting on the kitchen table, his face in his hands.

the confused male approached tyler slowly, not wanting to upset him or frighten him, as if he was an animal. he sat down across from him, not sure if tyler noticed him or not.

''so...'' tyler said suddenly, surprising the man. ''what's your name?''

''craig. my name's craig.'' craig responded.

''i'm tyler.''

''nice to meet you.'' craig said, extending his hand to shake tyler's. tyler looked at his pale hand and back at his green eyes. he raised his arm slowly and shook craig's.

''was that really neccessary?''

''yes, yes it was.'' craig chuckled slightly, making tyler exhale out of his nose and smirk a bit.

they stayed in silence for a bit, just the sound of the party still happening next door in the background.

''why did you save me?''

that question took craig by surprise. ''what do you mean?''

tyler chuckled. ''what are the odds that you, exactly you, would be walking at that exact moment at that exact place and stop me from jumping?'' he said. ''you could've been anyone, i could've been anyone,'' his voice started getting a bit louder. ''but you still did it. why?''

craig stayed silent for a bit, thinking about his answer. ''well...'' he started. ''i was returning home early from a party i was invited to because i honestly did not want to be there, and when i passed by your house i saw you on the roof, i didn't know what to do. call the police? call a neighbour? i'm not from this neighbourhood!'' he said. ''a voice in my head said to ignore you, but... i couldn't just do nothing, let you injure yourself badly or in the worst case, die.''

''in short,'' he continued. ''i have feelings. i couldn't let you die. i already lost someone to suicide, i don't want to lose another, even if it's a stranger.''

then there was silence. no one talked, just the sound of each other breathing. it's like nothing else was happening in the world, just pure silence.

''we should start to get knowing each other.'' craig said, breaking the silence. tyler looked up at him, raising one of his eyebrows.

''really?''

''really.''

tyler sighed. ''fine. here, i'm gonna start.'' he said, crossing his arms on the table. ''i hate christmas.''

craig's expression fell. ''why? it's one of the happiest periods of time!''

''to some, yes, but to me, no.'' tyler said.

craig pouted. ''but why?''

if other people were asked that they would usually say that it's too cold, or they don't know what presents to get, or that they get annoyed by carols and christmas songs.

but tyler doesn't hate christmas for these reasons, at all.

''i'm just... lonely. all my friends go away to their families or significant other's, i don't talk to my family anymore,'' tyler said, playing with his fingers. ''i've spend christmas alone so many times that i've gotten so tired of it, and it made me hate christmas cause i know that nothing will be different each year.''

craig stayed silent, trying to take in what tyler said. he may just have just met this guy, but it feels like they've been friends for years. like he knows what he's gone through.

''we...'' he started to say, gaining tyler's attention. ''we can spend christmas together, if you want.''

tyler looked at craig's eyes and expected to see lies and fake sympathy, but it was the complete opposite. he saw warmth, and geniune sympathy, and love.

tyler just shrugged his shoulders.

 

_another year's over_

_you're spent on the floor_

_you burn all the pictures_

_you hang from your door_

_you've got family and friends_

_but you don't really talk anymore_

_just like last year_

 

suddenly an idea came to craig's mind.

''do you have a christmas tree?'' he asked, taking tyler by surprise.

''i do, it's in one of my closets, i think.'' tyler responded, confused.

craig got up quickly and ran through the closets in tyler's bedroom, finally coming across the box that contained the christmas tree, and a box full of ornaments. craig got them and walked back to the living room, putting them down in the middle of the room. tyler got up from where he was watching in the kitchen and walked over to craig.

''so... now what?''

'''now what'? we put it up!'' craig exclaimed excited.

tyler groaned. ''are you serious?'' he asked annoyed.

''yes i am very serious.'' craig said and started opening the christmas tree box. tyler rolled his eyes and started helping craig. he really didn't want to do this but honestly it's better than laying on the floor alone.

slowly but surely, they finally put up the christmas tree. they decided to put some music in the background to really get into the christmas mood, much to tyler's complains. they started decorating the tall tree, putting ornaments in every branch possible.

''why are you putting ornaments in the back of the tree?'' tyler asked suddenly while placing an ornament, making craig look at him confused. ''i mean, no one's gonna look there.''

''so what?'' craig said, and continued placing ornaments. ''that's like not wearing clothes on your back and bottoms. just because people don't look at that side all the time, it doesn't mean that you should've decorate it.''

''that was a terrible analogy.''

''thanks, i try.''

when they were finished, they stood back and admired their work. the tree was full of ornaments, from bottom to top, with garlands and ribbons wrapped around the tree, and for the final touch, red and green lights. craig plugged in the lights and they immediately lit up, making the tree even better.

''isn't it amazing?'' craig asked excitedly, looking at tyler with a grin. tyler looked at tree for a minute. he has to admit, they did a pretty good job.

''eh, it's good i guess.''

''come on, it's amazing! the colours go perfect together, and the ornaments are placed in the right places and-''

''i'm kidding, calm down,'' tyler laughed, grabbing craig by his shoulders. ''it's great, we did a good job- well, mostly you, i just placed ornaments.''

craig blushed a bit. ''thank you, but you did a lot as well.''

''yeah, whatever.'' tyler said, and sat down on the beige-coloured couch. the music was still playing in the background, it was a nice touch honestly. craig sat down next to tyler, and let out a breath. decorating that tree really tired them both.

''i'm gonna get us something to drink.'' tyler said, getting up and walking to the kitchen.

''okay!''

tyler opened his fridge, seeings milk, fruits, vegetables, some beers, and other stuff you would usually find in a fridge. he scratched off the idea of beers, he didn't want to get drunk again.

''want some hot chocolate?'' tyler asked.

''sure!'' craig called from the living room.

tyler got the milk from the fridge and the cocoa powder from the cabinet and lit up the stove. he put a kettle on the burning stove and poured some milk in. after waiting for the milk to heat up, he poured it in two mugs and put some cocoa in them. he mixed it until the colour was a soft brown. he then got some marshmallows from the cabinet and put three in each mug.

he got both of the mugs and walked into the living room, where craig was still sitting on the couch. he gave craig's mug to him, sitting down next to the man while sipping his own hot chocolate.

''mmm, it's really good.'' craig said, taking a sip, careful to not burn himself.

tyler took a sip and got some marshmallow on his top lip, not realizing. craig giggled and covered his mouth with his hand. he was a bit red and his eyes squinted a bit, and tyler thought it was so adorable.

''what? what happened?'' tyler asked, a smile creeping its way into his face from craig giggling.

''nothing,'' craig giggled. ''just some marshmallow on your lip.''

tyler wiped his top lip and jokingly punched craig on his arm. the pair sat on the couch and drank their hot chocolate and just talked. they talked about themselves mostly, from their favorite colour to their favorite memory, from their favorite game to their worst teacher they have had. they learned so much about each other and it felt nice, being able to share information and exchange laughter and happiness.

at one point they stopped talking and their laughter quietened down. the silence was nice and comfortable, like they were two good ol' buddies catching up.

craig was staring at tyler, how blue his eyes were and how the ends of his mouth didn't always turn up to smile, the little details about him. tyler noticed that craig was looking at him and craig blushed a bit, tyler noticing that too. he chuckled a bit, trying to hold in his laugh, but craig started chuckling as well which made him lose it and start laughing, craig joining him.

the night soon came to an end and craig had to leave. both he and tyler were kinda sad to let each other go, but didn't made a big deal about it because they are adults, and they know that the other has a life to live.

''i'm glad i spend the night with you, i had a lot of fun.'' craig said while putting on his coat, standing in the doorway across from tyler.

''i'm glad you spend the night with me. god knows where i'd be right now.'' tyler said, smiling a bit.

craig grinned warmly, and suddenly hugged tyler, taking him by surprise. tyler didn't hug back at first, not knowing what to do, as he hasn't hugged anyone in a very long time. he slowly wrapped his arms around craig's body, trying to get used to the feeling of embracing someone. he smiled and closed his eyes, feeling warm inside his heart. after a minute of hugging they slowly pulled away, both of them smiling.

''that wasn't so bad, was it?'' craig asked.

tyler chuckled. ''no, no it wasn't.'' he said.

''i'll see you again soon?'' craig asked with a hopeful tone. tyler nodded.

''of course.'' tyler said, putting his hands in his pockets. ''merry christmas craig.''

''merry christmas to you too, tyler.'' craig said and turned around, walking away from tyler's doorway to the sidewalk outside his house. he looked back at tyler one more time, and waved at him, before walking to the direction of his house.

tyler watched him walk until he couldn't see him anymore. he sighed and walked back in his house, closing the door behind him. he slid down against it, till he reached the floor. he smiled and closed his eyes, resting his head against the door.

 

_oh no, another christmas alone_

_I would talk you down_

_if you would answer your phone_

_please don't jump_

 

++

 

''daddy, daddy wake up! it's christmas!''

tyler opened his eyes and saw his daughter vanessa jumping on his and his husband's bed, a huge grin on her face, her eyes shining with excitement. tyler laughed and rubbed his eyes, sitting up on his bed.

''alright, alright, calm down sweetie, i'm up.'' he said, trying to calm his daughter down. the excited girl stopped jump and fell on tyler hugging him, giggling.

''come on! dadda and olie are waiting downstairs!'' she exclaimed once she pulled away. she got off the bed and ran downstairs into their living room.

tyler got up, pulling the covers off of him, and went into the bathroom. he looked at himself, he looked... okay. he had slight bags under his eyes but that was mostly because of his children not being able to sleep and having to look after them. but other than that, he looked healthy. heathier than five years ago. five years ago he was this miserable person, who wanted nothing more than to end his suffering.

and now, he's the happiest he has ever been.

he brushed his teeth and washed his face, and then went downstairs where his children and husband were. oliver and vanessa were bouncing with excitement to open their presents that santa got them, while craig watched them with a grin and a warm coffee in hand.

when they noticed that tyler had arrived they sat him down and began opening presents. the kids laughed and talked how much they liked their presents while tyler and craig just sat and watched them, happy that their children happy with their presents.

''merry christmas baby.'' craig said and kissed his cheek.

tyler sighed happily and wrapped his arm around his husband.

''merry christmas.''

 

_don't jump._

 

 

**the end.**


End file.
